FISH…..IN……SPACE!

Today, six dozen fish discovered they had the right stuff when German scientists launched them into space. During the brief ten-minute flight, the scientists watched to see if any astro-swimmers turned green around the gills as they swam in tiny aquariums aboard the rocket. The space race was part of a project about motion sickness, since fish and humans have similar biology in the projectile hurling department. Those chosen to give one small swish for finkind were cichlids, described as ‘sporty’ and ‘muscular.’ The cichlids were picked over goldfish, who were tagged as ‘fat and messy.’ Even with fish, space is all about the jocks. Bet there were a few nerdy goldfish with headsets in the control room, though.

A spokesman said that the fish landed safely, although one would expect they’re used to splashdowns.

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Peeping landlord busted for taping tenants

Ever get the feeling you’re being watched? If you lived in the German city of Ingolstadt, you may be right. A lurking landlord was arrested after one of his tenants discovered that the apartment was wired with secret surveillance cameras, unveiling the unblinking eye while cleaning. While that’s enough to bust for invasion of privacy, the secret that makes you go ewwwww is this: he had been taping people in their apartments for TEN YEARS, recording at least seven current and former tenants, plus an untold number of their visitors. Police suspect the dirty old man wasn’t just worried about how tidy the flats were, and wired the apartments because of other, more perverted motives. While the police statement was beautifully framed with a silent DUH, done ever so splendidly in told-you-so calligraphy, one has to wonder: would it have been creepier if he was just checking to see if the bathrooms had been cleaned this week?

Drunk or zombie? German citizens can’t tell

When traveling through Germany, remember this rule: Don’t fall asleep on the train in zombie makeup. A young man, dressed in his bloody best for an early Halloween bash, caught some inebriated snooze time while riding home on the train. Fellow passengers mistook the makeup for actual blood; when they couldn’t immediately revive the pooped-out partier, they assumed he was a murder victim and contacted the authorities. After determining the man was indeed alive, just pickled to the gills, he was allowed to continue his trip–sans his gory decoration. The incident happened in Bad Segeburg, a rural area that isn’t as familiar with the Halloween tradition, said a police spokesperson, and apparently is zombie-free. Wonder what would happen if he traveled through Good Segeburg?