From the you-can’t-make-this-crap-up department:
First the Alien Autopsy hoax, now this: recent crop circles in Tasmania aren’t being created from on high, they’re the result of being high. Some toking teenagers with ropes and boards? Not this time; blame it on Woodstock for Wallabies. The animals are snacking in the poppy fields, then grooving to their own beat and stomping circles into the harvest. While getting hoppy in the poppies is nothing new, these whacked-out wallabies had UFO researchers fooled briefly, before farmers set the story straight. No reports on anyone actually interviewing the spaced-out kangaroo cousins to see if they saw aliens during their rave, most likely because the eyewitness account would be “Hey, duuuuuuuuude, you got any Chee-tos?”
Likewise, reports that the ringleader was an animated Tasmanian Devil have not been verified.
Calling Samuel L. Jackson: You’re needed Down Under.
Four out of twelve baby pythons escaped from their cargo box during a recent flight from Alice Springs to Melbourne earlier this week, causing the airline to cancel two flights while searching for the slithering tykes. The tiny terrors, shipped with their less rebellious brethren in a foam box with holes, had apparently de-boarded, according to a snake expert who attempted to ferret out the non-poisonous wigglers. The plane was then fumigated, and put back in service. Reports of four slithery hitch hikers carrying tiny bags of peanuts near the airport couldn’t be confirmed.
In a related story, the latest trend of flying while tucking your feet under you and slapping at any magazine that moves seems to be all the rage.
A prankster flooded the offices of the Santa Monica Pier Aquarium (warning, PDF link) recently, but the culprit didn’t make a clean escape; in fact, it was an inside job.
Staff members blame a small, friendly two-spotted octopus, and since she has eight arms, one can assume she’s all hands, although no one knows if she was just trying to get a leg up in the aquarium food chain. Apparently the super-ambidextrous showgirl pulled on a valve in her tank, flooding it and the facility’s offices. Local authorities believe the incident was a natural accident, but a talkative sea urchin says too many safe-cracking movies may be to blame.
The staff cleaned up the water just before a large group of schoolkids showed up for a tour, which robbed the tots of some true entertainment: watching the wily octopus make her bid for liquid world domination.
An additional note: isn’t it nice to read about something ‘octo’ without the word ‘mom’ attached?